I'm a hopeless optimist when it comes to our possibilities to have a pleasant life. It surely doesn't come by itself. Well, only one thing comes by itself, and that's death. So rather than spending our time on earth with regrets, complaints, and frustration it makes more sense to own the marks we leave behind - without trying to undo them. "Did I make a bad impression?" "Did I say the right thing?" "Did I embarrass myself?" "Am I likable?"... It's good of course to know the effect we have on others, but not in the common anxious way. Every day I can say 'yes, okay' to myself without hiding or exaggerating is a day of freedom.